Toxicity can be defined as the state of being poisonous. Often times we want change. Often times we don’t even know where to start. I feel as if our relationships around us determine our well being. Our well being is essentially how we measure happiness and health.
Currently I’m listening to “Bit** Don’t Kill My Vibe” it’s old but it still resonates with me. “Sometimes I need to be alone bit** don’t kill my vibe.” I like to consider myself as an introvert and more so a loner. I love people, I love serving others in need and I truly believe in the strength of humanity. But still most of the time I am the most comfortable when I am by myself. Now I must admit most of the best moments of my life have involved other people, special people. No matter how often I like to label myself as an introvert I truly love being with my loved ones.
I truly believe our happiness can be measured on how good our relationships can be. Some people think relationships are only romantic. Relationships involve your family, friends, co- workers, children, associates and lover. If your relationships are a mess 9/10 your life is a mess. There are some people who think they can survive in this world by themselves….I laugh at those people. I laugh because we all need somebody.
It’s pretty dope when you meet people who are truly irreplaceable. It’s truly dope when you meet people who love you for just being you. Those dope people love all of you including your flaws. Those dope people are patient with you. Those dope people pray for you without you asking. Those dope people support you and expect nothing in return. I have been blessed to have some pretty dope people in my life, it’s not many but I am blessed. A wise woman once told me that, “one true friend is worth more than a crew of fakes.” As I grow older I reflect more and more on quality than quantity. As a result some people haven’t reached where I am now in life. Some people have to get left behind not because they are horrible. We just outgrow some people and some situations.
Lately I have been in constant reflection on who should be in my life and who should not be in my life. It’s essential for me to realize that some relationships are indeed toxic to my growth. I am no longer accepting half a** love, people who can not ever apologize for their faults (because let’s be real we are not perfect, we are humans), people who I have to beg for their time, energy or support. I am no longer accepting those who are not patient with me and attack my character. I am no longer accepting friends who do not act like friends. I am no longer accepting one sided relationships. I am no longer accepting conditional love.
I really do not understand why I accepted that type of love before. I guess we “accept the love we think we deserve.” One of the hardest lessons in life for me is letting go. I want to take everyone I ever met that a held a special place in life with me…..that’s not possible. Some people are here for a season, seasons and some are here for a lifetime.
As I reevaluate who deserves a permanent spot in my life I reflect on regardless of who comes and goes I will always have the best relationship with My Creator, God. God is omnipresent and that’s truly special.