Well looks like it’s another night I am up past my bedtime. Fail. Fail. Faillll! I guess setting my bedtime for 9pm is unrealistic. I would love to be one of those people that goes to sleep early and rises up very early. I had another good day but some things I don’t like about myself were highlighted. I like to think I’m a #PositivePatty and apparently other people who observe me think I’m that way as well. Truth is….I’m not always positive. Truth is I am still a work in progress and I don’t know when my masterpiece will be finished.
My alarm clock went off I think at like 7am this morning. I didn’t officially get out of bed until 10:45am. Yikes but heyyy I’m on break from everything. I’m on break from being an educator and I’m on break from being a student. I still have a ton of things to do but I’ve enjoyed sleeping in late almost everyday. I took my dog Ra’Ja out for his morning walk. We came back to our apartment and I prepared for the day. I had a chance to make a few YouTube videos which in fact is uncomfortable for me. I am not used to speaking in front of a camera, their are so many things to be mindful of (rolls eyes). People say, “great things never come from comfort zones.” So I’m getting uncomfortable one day at a time :). My mother and I decided to grab lunch together today. The weather was beautiful and we were on our way to sip tea, eat shrimp tempura and share stories at The Green Ginger. On the way to The Green Ginger my mom mentioned that I should grab lunch with someone I’m not fond of soon. Immediately the mood changed and I felt like I was being set up by my own mama!! Why would she mention me eating lunch with “such and such”? I vocalized my feelings and for that moment in time things went downhill. It’s crazy how a comment could change the whole mood. I felt justified with my feelings and I insisted I wouldn’t be “fake” by spending time with someone I’m not fond of. Earlier today I had no regrets. Now…..I have regrets. I speak so much about positivity, showing love and being supportive of others. I listen to motivational messages about loving your neighbors and forgiveness. I feel bad now because in this aspect I wasn’t practicing what I’ve been preaching. I need to let go of bitterness, unforgiveness and judging others due to their faults. No one is perfect. We could all be more loving. We could all be more mindful of our words. We could all be more patient with others.
It may seem cliche but What Would God Do? We were created in his image. We have to shine our lights!