The Disease of More

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Jungle

“These days, I’m letting God handle all things above me
The things I can’t change are the reasons you love me
Listen you can hear them calling my name
I’m all over the place, I can’t sit in one place
I’m not ashamed at all
Still findin’ myself, let alone a soulmate, I’m just sayin’.”-Drake

The Person You Really Need to Marry

Okay let’s be transparent for a second. Ladies when we get to be 23 years old & up we feel this intense pressure from our family, friends and associates to rush to the alter once we meet the one. Sometimes wedding culture is all we talk about with our girlfriends. Marriage is a beautiful commitment.

BUT I am here to REMIND YOU……

The person you really need to marry is yourself. Marry yourself first before you commit a lifetime with another amazing individual.

Marry Yourself First. Watch this video, very insighful!

on the wayyy up

on the wayyy up

“i’m a sinner who’s probably going to sin again.”- K.Dot

on the wayyy up

I can’t look down

can’t look at what’s behind me

unless it’s a lesson in it

better be a blessing in it

on the wayyy up

I can’t forget to be humble

on the wayyy up

I can’t forget to pull my tribe up with me

on the wayyy up

I need to be a lot more selective

on the wayyy up

I need to let go of bad habits

on the wayyy up

I gotta let go of some people

and yeah it hurts

because we were ride or die

you were the one who saw me cry

on the wayyy up

it’s a process

on the wayyy up

we think we’re always in bloom

but just like seasons just like the winter there is a time when all the leaves fall

there is a time we don’t feel alive

there is a time we feel so alive

on the wayyy up

we realize our purpose

on the wayyy up

we don’t always look up

so we lose sight of who we are meant to be

we choose a life of complaceny

we become content

on the wayyy up

we learn that what we have is not enough

it’s more to life than just this

on the wayyy up

it’s not a clear and scenic route

on the wayyy up

toxicity

Toxicity can be defined as the state of being poisonous. Often times we want change. Often times we don’t even know where to start. I feel as if our relationships around us determine our well being. Our well being is essentially how we measure happiness and health.

Currently I’m listening to “Bit** Don’t Kill My Vibe” it’s old but it still resonates with me. “Sometimes I need to be alone bit** don’t kill my vibe.” I like to consider myself as an introvert and more so a loner. I love people, I love serving others in need and I truly believe in the strength of humanity. But still most of the time I am the most comfortable when I am by myself. Now I must admit most of the best moments of my life have involved other people, special people. No matter how often I like to label myself as an introvert I truly love being with my loved ones.

I truly believe our happiness can be measured on how good our relationships can be. Some people think relationships are only romantic. Relationships involve your family, friends, co- workers, children, associates and lover. If your relationships are a mess 9/10 your life is a mess. There are some people who think they can survive in this world by themselves….I laugh at those people. I laugh because we all need somebody.

It’s pretty dope when you meet people who are truly irreplaceable. It’s truly dope when you meet people who love you for just being you. Those dope people love all of you including your flaws. Those dope people are patient with you. Those dope people pray for you without you asking. Those dope people support you and expect nothing in return. I have been blessed to have some pretty dope people in my life, it’s not many but I am blessed. A wise woman once told me that, “one true friend is worth more than a crew of fakes.” As I grow older I reflect more and more on quality than quantity. As a result some people haven’t reached where I am now in life. Some people have to get left behind not because they are horrible. We just outgrow some people and some situations.

Lately I have been in constant reflection on who should be in my life and who should not be in my life. It’s essential for me to realize that some relationships are indeed toxic to my growth. I am no longer accepting half a** love, people who can not ever apologize for their faults (because let’s be real we are not perfect, we are humans), people who I have to beg for their time, energy or support. I am no longer accepting those who are not patient with me and attack my character. I am no longer accepting friends who do not act like friends. I am no longer accepting one sided relationships. I am no longer accepting conditional love.

I really do not understand why I accepted that type of love before. I guess we “accept the love we think we deserve.” One of the hardest lessons in life for me is letting go. I want to take everyone I ever met that a held a special place in life with me…..that’s not possible. Some people are here for a season, seasons and some are here for a lifetime.

As I reevaluate who deserves a permanent spot in my life I reflect on regardless of who comes and goes I will always have the best relationship with My Creator, God. God is omnipresent and that’s truly special.